The spiritual challenges that people in the LDS faith are having in this day and age stir me to want to bear witness of some truths.
One of my favorite church books is “Christ and the Inner Life” by Truman Madsen. I have loved this book since I was missionary age. One of the chapters in the book is titled “Twenty Questions,” where Brother Madsen describes a conversation he had with another man who had drifted away from the church. He asked the man about twenty varying questions to gauge his depth of experience and understanding of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. At the end of the conversation, Brother Madsen concluded that his friend was ‘a member of the church but was not really “in” the church.’ I love that chapter of the book. It is perhaps the best ‘litmus test’ of sorts that I know of to measure a person’s depth of conversion and faith in the gospel. I have created my own list of questions here, based on Brother Madsen’s list. I give reference to this book because I didn’t want to plagiarize something I respect so much and believe to be quite profound.
Here are the questions I would like everyone to ask themselves:
Not Lost in the Crowd
Do you feel like just another obscure person in the church, one in a crowd of people trying to worship a disconnected being that nobody knows? Or do you know that God is your Heavenly Father – your Father – and that He knows you personally? Have you ever experienced a feeling of closeness to Him when you have fasted or prayed, or simply pondered on spiritual things?
Feasting on the Word
Have you ever become so interested in reading the scriptures that you just did not want to put them down? Granted, it probably didn’t happen while reading Isaiah, but have you ever enjoyed reading to the point where boredom, other priorities, or even sleep fled from you? Joseph Smith stated that ‘he who reads [the Book of Mormon] most will like it best’. Have you experienced this?
Speaking Directly to You
Have you ever felt while reading in the scriptures, wherever in them you were reading, that the words jumped off the page and spoke directly to you? Have you ever been able to do what Nephi did and ‘liken them unto yourself, that they might be for your own profit and learning’? Moroni told us that he ‘saw our day, and knew our doing’. Have you ever felt that some verses of scripture fit your circumstances or concerns so accurately that these ancient prophets could have meant their words just for you?
Just For You
While pondering about the Atonement of Christ, perhaps during the administration of the sacrament, have you ever stopped to really think about what the Savior did for you personally? Not as a general service for all, but for you? Have you ever thought about the big mistakes you’ve made in your life, and considered how He can just make them go away? Perhaps you have personally felt the cleansing that comes from feeling forgiven. Have you ever really studied with an open heart the words of Hymn 193, “I Stand All Amazed”? Have you ever become emotional when considering the incredible gift of redemption that Christ gave to you?
Words Beyond Your Own
Have you ever born your testimony, given a talk, given a blessing, or shared or defended the gospel of Jesus Christ in some other situation, and realized that you were using words that were not your own, or that thoughts came to your mind that did not originate from any memory or experience you had had? The Savior taught us that the words we need to share would be given to us at the very moment. Have you ever experienced this, and been able to understand where those words came from?
Have you ever had the experience when you definitely felt the presence of more people, perhaps many more, than you could physically see? A ‘crowded’ place where you couldn’t see the crowd? Perhaps the death of a loved one, or a birth, or an experience in the temple?
Loving Those You Serve
When you have served other people, whether it be a home teaching or visiting teaching assignment, an extra act of service like taking a meal or repairing a car, or something else for someone who needed help… did you do it because you felt obligated? Did you do it because you felt the need to ‘give back’ what had once been given to you? Or did you do it because through a life of serving others, you have learned to feel love for those in whom you have taken some personal ‘ownership’ in their happiness or well-being?
Talking to a Friend
When you pray most earnestly, perhaps while in the car alone, or during a personal trial, do you really open up to Heavenly Father and talk to Him as if He is sitting there next to you? Do you talk to Him as if he is distant and mildly interested in you, or do you talk to him openly and candidly as if He was a personal friend?
Have you ever really struggled? Ever had your faith tried and tested by some challenge in your life? Pushed to what you believed was your breaking point? Did you plead with your Father for answers or relief? It can be something as simple as paying tithing when you feel like you can’t afford it, and you see blessings come that are otherwise unexplainable. It can be as simple as recovering from a sickness or injury after a priesthood blessing. It can also be something bigger, like seeing a loved one healed of a terrible disease, or finding a job when your financial back was against the wall. And when you did your part to exercise your faith, to increase your obedience or humility, did you see the blessings come? Did you recognize where those blessings came from? Have you repeated this process enough times in your life to know that it will continue to happen as you humble yourself and draw near to your Father?
Listening Deeply and Patiently
When you pray about something that is deeply concerning to you, do you prepare? And do you listen? I mean, really listen? Before you actually starting ‘talking’ in your prayer, did you take some time to ponder on the situation? And after you ended your prayer, did you just get back to the mundane tasks of life and forget about the process of spiritual communication and revelation, or did you continue to ponder for a while and listen closely to the Spirit? In the same way we need to let our eyes dilate and adjust to darkness if we want to look at the stars at night, we must let our minds eliminate the noise of life and become more sensitive to revelation. Have you ever just listened for a while after praying?
Your Will or His Will
When you have prayed during tough times, did you ask for guidance to help you grow from your trial, or did you ask for relief to make it go away? Most often the Lord wants us to grow. He wants us to work through it and become stronger. He has the objective of growing us and preparing us to be like Him and to do what He does. That cannot happen if He just bails us out. Did you pray for what you wanted, or did you pray to know His will in your circumstances?
A person who can answer all or most of these questions affirmatively – meaning that you have depth of experience in the gospel – is not one who is ‘delicate’ in their faith, and who is not prone to have their spiritual foundation weakened by issues like Ordain Women, Joseph Smith and polygamy, or some newfound controversial documents about Joseph Smith or other church-related issues that have suddenly appeared on the internet. A person who answers these questions affirmatively has depth to their faith. They have a deeper knowledge based on their experience with spiritual things. They put their trust in what they have proven time and time again – tests of faith followed by consistent and dependable blessings, as well as personal revelation in many contexts. They do not trust the wisdom of the world more than they trust God, His prophets and His divinely revealed word. Those who answer affirmatively are like Jacob when he was confronted by Sherem in Jacob 7:5. Their faith cannot easily be shaken by worldly ‘wisdom’.
Those who have not had the experiences I ask about in these questions are not only likely to look to the world, but they are more likely to mock those who don’t do the same. They may be ‘at church’ but they are not ‘in the church’. They do not understand the spiritual essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ. They try to prove… or more accurately disprove… the validity of the gospel, using worldly evidence. This is impossible. See 1 Corinthians 2:11-14. Yet they try because they have no other methods available to them in their state of denying the Spirit of revelation.
There are no examples in the scriptures of anyone who embraced the gospel of Jesus Christ because they proved it using physical evidence, documents they read, or because they heard it from someone else. They embraced it because they had a spiritual witness, much like Peter did (Matthew 16:16-17). Trying to prove spiritual truths through worldly physical evidence is not only impossible, but it is frankly absurd in my opinion. Yet those who cannot receive a spiritual witness, either because they refuse to earnestly seek the truth at the risk of being wrong, or are simply unable to humble themselves before the Lord, will always be frustrated. So they mock.
“Blessed are they who humble themselves without being compelled to be humble” (Alma 32:16).